








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 618 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 749 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4861 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,958 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7416 | 22% |
| Smokes | 7527 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 10807 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 8208 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,074,870 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 262 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Achmed | 55% | 47 |
| #2 | Sir mourning | 54% | 57 |
| #3 | A.D | 51% | 82 |
| #4 | Nicky | 49% | 243 |
| #5 | SuperSqurrl | 49% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Straat-Kat | 46% | 357 |
| #10 | Enigma | 46% | 145 |
| #11 | Manik | 45% | 91 |
| #12 | BOT Alexei | 45% | 47 |
| #13 | Manni K | 34% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Straat-Kat | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | NecessaryEvil | 8 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Nicky | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | (>_VOSS_<) | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Manik | 6 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Straat-Kat | 480 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #2 | Manik | 366 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | NecessaryEvil | 260 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | A.D | 244 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | SuperSqurrl | 120 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Manik | +3.58 | 57 | 60 |
| #2 | A.D | +2.97 | 55 | 63 |
| #3 | NecessaryEvil | +1.78 | 33 | 45 |
| #4 | (>_VOSS_<) | +1.74 | 49 | 51 |
| #5 | G4ME_ON | +1.43 | 39 | 47 |





