








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 89 matches | ||
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2076 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,369 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1339 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1541 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1643 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 846 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $693,360 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramsvikveien | 49% | 41 |
| #2 | Jordi El Nino Polla | 44% | 91 |
| #3 | Pinocchio | 44% | 32 |
| #4 | Sindrikke | 42% | 109 |
| #5 | KÆSP | 36% | 185 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Jordi El Nino Polla | 44% | 91 |
| #3 | Pinocchio | 44% | 32 |
| #4 | Sindrikke | 42% | 109 |
| #5 | KÆSP | 36% | 185 |
| #6 | andi | 23% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sindrikke | 55 | 0.0265 |
| #2 | KÆSP | 30 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Jordi El Nino Polla | 18 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | Ramsvikveien | 5 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | Pinocchio | 3 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sindrikke | 302 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #2 | Jordi El Nino Polla | 177 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Ramsvikveien | 167 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | KÆSP | 92 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Pinocchio | 31 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramsvikveien | +5.29 | 75 | 80 |
| #2 | Pinocchio | +3.00 | 34 | 54 |
| #3 | Sindrikke | +2.96 | 54 | 42 |
| #4 | Jordi El Nino Polla | +0.03 | 42 | 52 |
| #5 | andi | -0.06 | 62 | 41 |





