








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
940 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,373 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1056 | 31% |
| Smokes | 792 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1002 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 523 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $229,716 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramsvikveien | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | Sindrikke | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Til_Vallhall | 44% | 91 |
| #4 | KÆSP | 41% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramsvikveien | 61% | 23 |
| #2 | Sindrikke | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Til_Vallhall | 44% | 91 |
| #4 | KÆSP | 41% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Til_Vallhall | 8 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | KÆSP | 5 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Sindrikke | 3 | 0.0123 |
| #4 | Ramsvikveien | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramsvikveien | 108 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #2 | Til_Vallhall | 91 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | Sindrikke | 45 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | KÆSP | 33 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramsvikveien | +5.39 | 77 | 77 |
| #2 | Sindrikke | +2.70 | 66 | 39 |
| #3 | Jordi El Nino Polla | -0.76 | 40 | 50 |
| #4 | KÆSP | -1.39 | 47 | 23 |
| #5 | Til_Vallhall | -3.63 | 34 | 45 |





