








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 960 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 329 matches | ||
| Wingman | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4684 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,897 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2825 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1736 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2940 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1396 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,237,727 of utility $255 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 229 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Augustín | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | PETE | 55% | 91 |
| #3 | počkej, volá mi kráter! | 49% | 231 |
| #4 | bumbumbhdhf EXPLOSIVE MAN | 48% | 124 |
| #5 | Adis235 | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Augustín | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | PETE | 55% | 91 |
| #3 | počkej, volá mi kráter! | 49% | 231 |
| #4 | bumbumbhdhf EXPLOSIVE MAN | 48% | 124 |
| #5 | Adis235 | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | počkej, volá mi kráter! | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | bumbumbhdhf EXPLOSIVE MAN | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Augustín | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Adis235 | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | počkej, volá mi kráter! | 382 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | PETE | 305 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | bumbumbhdhf EXPLOSIVE MAN | 269 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Augustín | 27 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Adis235 | 11 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Augustín | +3.38 | 88 | 43 |
| #2 | bumbumbhdhf EXPLOSIVE MAN | +2.01 | 79 | 50 |
| #3 | PETE | +0.81 | 74 | 61 |
| #4 | :BARON: | +0.76 | 68 | 49 |
| #5 | počkej, volá mi kráter! | -0.58 | 65 | 47 |





