








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 725 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 258 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2933 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,972 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4926 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4560 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2416 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 4070 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,379,446 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 194 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mJ^^ | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Forky | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | caderno | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | unrivaled | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | TirioNN | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | caderno | 1782 | 0.31 | 43 min |
| #2 | TirioNN | 651 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #3 | El Shady Gato | 440 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #4 | mJ^^ | 407 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #5 | Forky | 307 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | unrivaled | +4.08 | 83 | 57 |
| #2 | TirioNN | +3.81 | 82 | 57 |
| #3 | mJ^^ | +3.38 | 81 | 65 |
| #4 | =FLBB= L0tus | +1.04 | 39 | 71 |
| #5 | caderno | +0.05 | 65 | 75 |





