








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1894 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,013 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1101 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1369 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1689 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1854 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,273,081 of utility $274 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 181 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | caderno | 49% | 167 |
| #7 | Cuca Beludo | 48% | 199 |
| #8 | TirioNN | 47% | 85 |
| #9 | WipeClownZ | 42% | 52 |
| #10 | El Shady Gato | 40% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cuca Beludo | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | mJ^^ | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | TirioNN | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | unrivaled | 4 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | caderno | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | caderno | 1106 | 0.31 | 28 min |
| #2 | Cuca Beludo | 999 | 0.24 | 26 min |
| #3 | TirioNN | 370 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #4 | El Shady Gato | 287 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #5 | mJ^^ | 279 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TirioNN | +4.99 | 83 | 60 |
| #2 | unrivaled | +4.23 | 82 | 47 |
| #3 | mJ^^ | +3.26 | 82 | 65 |
| #4 | =FLBB= L0tus | +0.69 | 39 | 69 |
| #5 | caderno | +0.01 | 64 | 75 |





