








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
851 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,791 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 137 | 8% |
| Smokes | 97 | 5% |
| HE Grenades | 722 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 835 | 47% |
Our logs show you have wasted $98,418 of utility $50 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1elu | 69% | 72 |
| #2 | 123 | 69% | 68 |
| #3 | Timo | 68% | 74 |
| #4 | Darius™ | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Guiman | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Darius™ | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Guiman | 55% | 20 |
| #6 | 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 | 53% | 15 |
| #7 | xenos & | 43% | 7 |
| #8 | ReplayBro | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 123 | 10 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | M1elu | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Guiman | 2 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Timo | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 123 | 244 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | Timo | 232 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | M1elu | 184 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | Guiman | 31 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 | 29 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1elu | +4.50 | 76 | 62 |
| #2 | ReplayBro | +1.44 | 63 | 44 |
| #3 | Guiman | +1.30 | 72 | 50 |
| #4 | edipoe13ᴺ̶ⁱ̶ᵍ̶ʰ̶ | -0.14 | 64 | 37 |
| #5 | Timo | -0.17 | 43 | 57 |





