








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 76 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
619 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,232 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 626 | 51% |
| Smokes | 478 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 68 | 6% |
| Molotovs | 60 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $227,519 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Say Furry Gex | 27% | 48 |
| #12 | kozu ТУ ЕЩ НУЛ | 25% | 8 |
| #13 | Vitality Diamsmen | 13% | 8 |
| #14 | 愛'! | 11% | 9 |
| #15 | ✪ PsyckoPâtes | 0% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkillfulFrog | 220 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #2 | Say Furry Gex | 84 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Smoke Them All ʕ⁎̯͡⁎ʔ༄ | 68 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kza? | 41 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | kozu ТУ ЕЩ НУЛ | 37 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkillfulFrog | +10.17 | 90 | 42 |
| #2 | 𝙏𝙊𝙉𝙔 | +10.04 | 85 | 65 |
| #3 | Kza? | +5.62 | 91 | 50 |
| #4 | ✪ PsyckoPâtes | +5.26 | 90 | 70 |
| #5 | kozu ТУ ЕЩ НУЛ | +1.13 | 44 | 39 |





