








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 839 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 88 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4700 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2443 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3192 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3199 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1916 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,749,157 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ;3 | 49% | 45 |
| #2 | Crapo | 46% | 132 |
| #3 | ꜱᴀʏ ꜰᴜʀʀʏ ɢᴇx | 45% | 267 |
| #4 | Binks_Chilling | 44% | 54 |
| #5 | noehunter | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | noehunter | 44% | 41 |
| #6 | Herbus Doubledoor | 42% | 52 |
| #7 | 𝑼.𝑴.𝑳.𝑨 | 40% | 45 |
| #8 | speuspeu | 30% | 33 |
| #9 | LT.Diamsmen | 30% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crapo | 60 | 0.0228 |
| #2 | ꜱᴀʏ ꜰᴜʀʀʏ ɢᴇx | 55 | 0.0106 |
| #3 | 𝑼.𝑴.𝑳.𝑨 | 17 | 0.0191 |
| #4 | ;3 | 10 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | LT.Diamsmen | 9 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crapo | 635 | 0.24 | 16 min |
| #2 | ꜱᴀʏ ꜰᴜʀʀʏ ɢᴇx | 579 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | ;3 | 145 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | Herbus Doubledoor | 112 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | 𝑼.𝑴.𝑳.𝑨 | 83 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Crapo | +11.90 | 85 | 58 |
| #2 | ;3 | +1.34 | 58 | 55 |
| #3 | 𝑼.𝑴.𝑳.𝑨 | +1.31 | 86 | 39 |
| #4 | noehunter | +0.20 | 41 | 36 |
| #5 | ꜱᴀʏ ꜰᴜʀʀʏ ɢᴇx | -0.89 | 45 | 29 |





