








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 193 matches | ||
| Faceit | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5785 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,397 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4813 | 26% |
| Smokes | 6071 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3146 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 4367 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $976,317 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hoggy | 60% | 143 |
| #2 | kez 키쿄 | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | ✪ Gettobumser™ | 59% | 41 |
| #4 | Matetiion | 56% | 104 |
| #5 | ekul | 54% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | ♕gainS♕ | 52% | 129 |
| #9 | Zerik666 | 51% | 37 |
| #10 | mrvn | 48% | 50 |
| #11 | Lacryss | 44% | 50 |
| #12 | Yannis | 42% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕gainS♕ | 13 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Zerik666 | 11 | 0.0143 |
| #3 | ekul | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | mrvn | 6 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | Hoggy | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕gainS♕ | 509 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #2 | Hoggy | 384 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | Matetiion | 310 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | ekul | 230 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | mrvn | 121 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rono Q | +3.41 | 87 | 62 |
| #2 | Zerik666 | +1.93 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | Hoggy | +1.50 | 89 | 65 |
| #4 | ✪ Gettobumser™ | +1.14 | 58 | 72 |
| #5 | ♕gainS♕ | +0.60 | 81 | 63 |





