








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Wingman | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6104 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,202 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2652 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2818 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2739 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1993 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,736,004 of utility $247 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1958 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Torttumies | 63% | 94 |
| #2 | Makazze GOAT | 62% | 252 |
| #3 | .Osku | 56% | 158 |
| #4 | smartass | 54% | 120 |
| #5 | Fisu | 52% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | .Osku | 56% | 158 |
| #4 | smartass | 54% | 120 |
| #5 | Fisu | 52% | 75 |
| #6 | ropz | 52% | 54 |
| #7 | Eoj | 45% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .Osku | 59 | 0.0187 |
| #2 | Eoj | 18 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Torttumies | 18 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | smartass | 17 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | Makazze GOAT | 16 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .Osku | 493 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #2 | Makazze GOAT | 492 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #3 | Torttumies | 183 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | smartass | 149 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Fisu | 136 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .Osku | +4.06 | 72 | 54 |
| #2 | jauho | +3.53 | 73 | 44 |
| #3 | Makazze GOAT | +1.66 | 72 | 54 |
| #4 | smartass | +0.18 | 39 | 34 |
| #5 | Torttumies | -2.38 | 41 | 57 |





