








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
671 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 148 | 7% |
| Smokes | 774 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 535 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 686 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $463,463 of utility $222 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 150 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | astheboiiii | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | _ProHater_ | 54% | 48 |
| #3 | Kain | 51% | 75 |
| #4 | Ronnie Pickering | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | Jhames | 45% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | astheboiiii | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | _ProHater_ | 54% | 48 |
| #3 | Kain | 51% | 75 |
| #4 | Ronnie Pickering | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | Jhames | 45% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _ProHater_ | 7 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Jhames | 5 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Kain | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kain | 247 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | _ProHater_ | 137 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | Jhames | 93 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ronnie Pickering | 66 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | astheboiiii | 25 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _ProHater_ | +1.84 | 86 | 61 |
| #2 | astheboiiii | +1.78 | 65 | 46 |
| #3 | Kain | +1.62 | 58 | 63 |
| #4 | Miller | +1.25 | 34 | 37 |
| #5 | Ronnie Pickering | -2.94 | 28 | 43 |





