








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 224 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1633 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,946 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2362 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3035 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2175 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2374 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $853,028 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 254 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skillerx | 43% | 65 |
| #2 | Bennooo | 43% | 21 |
| #3 | Eichel Jürgenberg | 43% | 159 |
| #4 | VfL Forscher - Tamiro | 41% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skillerx | 43% | 65 |
| #2 | Bennooo | 43% | 21 |
| #3 | Eichel Jürgenberg | 43% | 159 |
| #4 | VfL Forscher - Tamiro | 41% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eichel Jürgenberg | 71 | 0.0232 |
| #2 | VfL Forscher - Tamiro | 31 | 0.0154 |
| #3 | Skillerx | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eichel Jürgenberg | 923 | 0.30 | 16 min |
| #2 | VfL Forscher - Tamiro | 233 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | Skillerx | 45 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | Bennooo | 26 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eichel Jürgenberg | +3.39 | 64 | 61 |
| #2 | Skillerx | -0.46 | 22 | 30 |
| #3 | Milkbottle | -1.11 | 40 | 44 |
| #4 | VfL Forscher - Tamiro | -1.11 | 25 | 51 |
| #5 | Bennooo | -1.48 | 30 | 22 |





