








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 202 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 408 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3977 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,933 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5656 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5226 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3798 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4253 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,343,295 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 367 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ༒𒆜𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕜𝕖𒆜༒ | 63% | 43 |
| #2 | H O T S H O T | 61% | 44 |
| #3 | Indian Cabbie | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | KA$H | 57% | 87 |
| #5 | Mutth Mantri | 55% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sicario | 863 | 0.18 | 21 min |
| #2 | Ekzistance | 584 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #3 | beeHop | 540 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #4 | ༒𒆜𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕜𝕖𒆜༒ | 288 | 0.31 | 7 min |
| #5 | RyzeNNNNNNN | 179 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ༒𒆜𝔻𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕜𝕖𒆜༒ | +1.40 | 71 | 76 |
| #2 | ZeniKoP | +1.30 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | Sicario | +0.82 | 68 | 66 |
| #4 | H O T S H O T | +0.73 | 48 | 74 |
| #5 | JS | +0.58 | 65 | 56 |





