








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 116 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 261 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3529 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,023 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3611 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3717 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3076 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2619 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,083,269 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheManInBlack [Gucci] | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | V-O-V | 50% | 38 |
| #3 | [CygaPb] RoadRunner | 48% | 23 |
| #4 | Babz | 44% | 45 |
| #5 | FoxR1o | 43% | 235 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheManInBlack [Gucci] | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | V-O-V | 50% | 38 |
| #3 | [CygaPb] RoadRunner | 48% | 23 |
| #4 | Babz | 44% | 45 |
| #5 | FoxR1o | 43% | 235 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FoxR1o | 15 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | V-O-V | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | [CygaPb] RoadRunner | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | TheManInBlack [Gucci] | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FoxR1o | 404 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #2 | Babz | 85 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | [CygaPb] RoadRunner | 60 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | V-O-V | 57 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | TheManInBlack [Gucci] | 26 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Babz | +1.79 | 69 | 67 |
| #2 | [CygaPb] RoadRunner | +1.22 | 66 | 64 |
| #3 | Meijoo | -0.47 | 67 | 65 |
| #4 | FoxR1o | -0.58 | 58 | 58 |
| #5 | V-O-V | -1.41 | 48 | 65 |





