








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 516 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3235 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,539 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1692 | 37% |
| Smokes | 908 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 836 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1103 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,270,974 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 53 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gog | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | MrHawkeye96 | 53% | 19 |
| #3 | King | 51% | 70 |
| #4 | JJBasic | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | :3 | 47% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | JJBasic | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | :3 | 47% | 143 |
| #6 | zach | bidenskins.loot | 43% | 35 |
| #7 | Frazzen | 41% | 37 |
| #8 | Sii | 40% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :3 | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Sii | 9 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | King | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | zach | bidenskins.loot | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Frazzen | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King | 266 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | :3 | 256 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | zach | bidenskins.loot | 105 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gog | 90 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | Sii | 77 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King | +2.30 | 67 | 68 |
| #2 | zach | bidenskins.loot | +0.41 | 78 | 54 |
| #3 | Frazzen | +0.31 | 43 | 35 |
| #4 | JJBasic | +0.28 | 59 | 60 |
| #5 | Sii | +0.11 | 53 | 45 |





