








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
685 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,807 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 452 | 25% |
| Smokes | 430 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 473 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 452 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $153,979 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jlaw | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | nisuäiä | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | einari | 55% | 22 |
| #4 | opa | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | Hakapaka | 50% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | opa | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | Hakapaka | 50% | 4 |
| #6 | WatukkA | 50% | 50 |
| #7 | Keppi | 49% | 39 |
| #8 | jurvelino | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WatukkA | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | jlaw | 1 | 0.0139 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keppi | 85 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | opa | 49 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | WatukkA | 28 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | nisuäiä | 26 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | einari | 25 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jokkepappa | +3.16 | 65 | 66 |
| #2 | nisuäiä | +2.94 | 84 | 62 |
| #3 | jlaw | +1.27 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | WatukkA | +0.57 | 57 | 56 |
| #5 | jurvelino | +0.53 | 81 | 88 |





