








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 577 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5102 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,793 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 689 | 5% |
| Smokes | 5655 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 3167 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3282 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,812,846 of utility $323 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FabCcn | 56% | 98 |
| #2 | Lio | 48% | 152 |
| #3 | Sugar | 47% | 199 |
| #4 | Rührei | 47% | 372 |
| #5 | Thomas Gottschalk | 39% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FabCcn | 56% | 98 |
| #2 | Lio | 48% | 152 |
| #3 | Sugar | 47% | 199 |
| #4 | Rührei | 47% | 372 |
| #5 | Thomas Gottschalk | 39% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sugar | 11 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Lio | 11 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Rührei | 8 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | FabCcn | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Thomas Gottschalk | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lio | 378 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | FabCcn | 330 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | Sugar | 232 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | Rührei | 182 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #5 | Thomas Gottschalk | 80 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FabCcn | +4.70 | 66 | 62 |
| #2 | Thomas Gottschalk | +1.70 | 64 | 57 |
| #3 | Lio | +0.39 | 42 | 60 |
| #4 | TataCcn | -0.77 | 38 | 32 |
| #5 | Sugar | -1.39 | 37 | 64 |





