








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 580 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 89 matches | ||
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4064 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,263 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1536 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1478 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1496 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1753 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,100,702 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pasty | 83% | 23 |
| #2 | âĒM1KESI | 73% | 40 |
| #3 | LiPE | 69% | 49 |
| #4 | ARS | 69% | 42 |
| #5 | Jewbacca | 68% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ARS | 120 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | Jewbacca | 105 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | BRB | 102 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | LiPE | 96 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Mlanky | 72 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wailfy | +4.50 | 89 | 51 |
| #2 | LiPE | +1.71 | 77 | 45 |
| #3 | Jewbacca | +1.52 | 72 | 59 |
| #4 | pasty | +1.25 | 72 | 51 |
| #5 | Mlanky | +0.00 | 61 | 66 |





