








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 353 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Faceit | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3572 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,454 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2335 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3765 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3078 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3276 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $752,828 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 643 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | horizon | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | ✪M1KESI | 69% | 51 |
| #3 | wailfy | 68% | 53 |
| #4 | Mlanky | 63% | 92 |
| #5 | pasty | 62% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Deano 阴茎 | 55% | 73 |
| #8 | samgk | 53% | 53 |
| #9 | TheRav3n | 52% | 25 |
| #10 | Krynex | 50% | 80 |
| #11 | HøøJ | 49% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Deano 阴茎 | 9 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | ARS | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | pasty | 5 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Krynex | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | ✪M1KESI | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ARS | 421 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #2 | Krynex | 315 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #3 | Mlanky | 262 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | Deano 阴茎 | 193 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | pasty | 114 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | horizon | +2.27 | 70 | 80 |
| #2 | Jewbacca | +2.07 | 76 | 53 |
| #3 | wailfy | +1.60 | 83 | 53 |
| #4 | pasty | +0.99 | 68 | 45 |
| #5 | ✪M1KESI | +0.77 | 73 | 65 |





