








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 70 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
872 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,291 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 512 | 22% |
| Smokes | 306 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 887 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 586 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $217,519 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | James Dean | 52% | 56 |
| #2 | huhu | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | fabu | 44% | 18 |
| #4 | envy | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | James Dean | 52% | 56 |
| #2 | huhu | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | fabu | 44% | 18 |
| #4 | envy | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | James Dean | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | James Dean | 85 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | fabu | 77 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | huhu | 43 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | envy | 4 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fabu | +1.78 | 85 | 72 |
| #2 | James Dean | +0.58 | 87 | 34 |
| #3 | kennySS | +0.04 | 74 | 55 |
| #4 | huhu | -0.46 | 64 | 79 |
| #5 | envy | -1.25 | 94 | 63 |





