








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1425 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 423 matches | ||
| Faceit | 371 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13140 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 49,096 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13781 | 28% |
| Smokes | 12636 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9936 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 12743 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,434,230 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1005 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eg0n | 57% | 72 |
| #2 | James Dean | 56% | 62 |
| #3 | Yoshio | 56% | 136 |
| #4 | envy | 55% | 330 |
| #5 | fabu | 54% | 309 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fabu | 1352 | 0.21 | 39 min |
| #2 | ✪Pasten Pasha | 968 | 0.12 | 30 min |
| #3 | envy | 344 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #4 | andor | 317 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #5 | Eg0n | 283 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fabu | +1.86 | 81 | 72 |
| #2 | ✪Pasten Pasha | +1.82 | 86 | 67 |
| #3 | .X1n0- | +1.52 | 87 | 68 |
| #4 | drayKo | +1.40 | 80 | 60 |
| #5 | envy | +0.54 | 88 | 54 |





