








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 369 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 111 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,267 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 951 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1860 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 677 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 779 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $889,718 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 120 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [RESA] TERRORIST | 8 | 0.0139 |
| #2 | eviluded | 7 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | deal | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | ijakedobekindabuns | 5 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | seal | 3 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deal | 542 | 0.22 | 15 min |
| #2 | seal | 352 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | eviluded | 322 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #4 | ijakedobekindabuns | 197 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #5 | zyvqt | 130 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [RESA] TERRORIST | +4.42 | 66 | 51 |
| #2 | seal | +2.12 | 54 | 51 |
| #3 | Thorcoo | +1.79 | 77 | 18 |
| #4 | zyvqt | +1.54 | 36 | 47 |
| #5 | ijakedobekindabuns | +0.92 | 52 | 54 |





