










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 340 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
803 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,204 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 426 | 35% |
| Smokes | 268 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 368 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 142 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $266,382 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | But | 54% | 35 |
| #2 | gurt | 51% | 47 |
| #3 | akinhaizzz | 45% | 29 |
| #4 | JACKOFF | 44% | 39 |
| #5 | Kratvamos | 41% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | akinhaizzz | 45% | 29 |
| #4 | JACKOFF | 44% | 39 |
| #5 | Kratvamos | 41% | 61 |
| #6 | Chuối hỏa ngục | 39% | 18 |
| #7 | Cung điện mờ ảo | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kratvamos | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | JACKOFF | 4 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | gurt | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Chuối hỏa ngục | 2 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | akinhaizzz | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kratvamos | 173 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | But | 98 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | akinhaizzz | 90 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | gurt | 76 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | JACKOFF | 40 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akinhaizzz | +3.73 | 75 | 36 |
| #2 | JACKOFF | +1.48 | 33 | 33 |
| #3 | But | +0.76 | 46 | 59 |
| #4 | Chuối hỏa ngục | +0.33 | 27 | 48 |
| #5 | Tron Mau Lieu | +0.19 | 18 | 29 |





