








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 204 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 89 matches | ||
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




61 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4411 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,438 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5677 | 39% |
| Smokes | 3251 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1539 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 3971 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,144,997 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1017 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | 74% | 34 |
| #2 | N1ps | 60% | 210 |
| #3 | cryptic | 59% | 82 |
| #4 | hutch | 57% | 191 |
| #5 | ♤key | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | czop | 53% | 55 |
| #8 | Sky-Fly | 52% | 123 |
| #9 | rem1cks | 51% | 55 |
| #10 | jxice. | 46% | 78 |
| #11 | bop | 45% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N1ps | 16 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | Sky-Fly | 15 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | hutch | 14 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | cryptic | 11 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | rem1cks | 5 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hutch | 531 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #2 | N1ps | 486 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #3 | jxice. | 353 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #4 | cryptic | 283 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #5 | bop | 267 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bop | +3.23 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | N1ps | +3.03 | 81 | 69 |
| #3 | hutch | +2.42 | 75 | 68 |
| #4 | rem1cks | +1.61 | 83 | 74 |
| #5 | ! B R 4 G G Y ! | +0.68 | 75 | 53 |





