








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 1055 matches | ||
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Wingman | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 72 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




110 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14986 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 61,875 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 21309 | 34% |
| Smokes | 15436 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 13565 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 11565 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,598,524 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7425 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | ULIvain | 49% | 391 |
| #11 | Finrape | 46% | 266 |
| #12 | NikkeX | 46% | 98 |
| #13 | Xenkknar | 43% | 87 |
| #14 | OskuFi | 42% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ULIvain | 77 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | OskuFi | 26 | 0.0117 |
| #3 | NikkeX | 18 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | Rikun Kissa Jari | 10 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | s0loer | 8 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rikun Kissa Jari | 1498 | 0.17 | 49 min |
| #2 | . | 1461 | 0.10 | 46 min |
| #3 | mrb0ss | 910 | 0.10 | 29 min |
| #4 | ULIvain | 853 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #5 | Finrape | 847 | 0.15 | 29 min |





