








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1990 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 324 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 164 matches | ||
| Faceit | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




140 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8820 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,978 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9606 | 33% |
| Smokes | 7311 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6828 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5233 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,175,422 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 973 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GroBoulard | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | N0kizzz | 49% | 107 |
| #3 | xKara_Mel | 48% | 48 |
| #4 | ★TaPz | 44% | 161 |
| #5 | mAdness | 40% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | mAdness | 40% | 42 |
| #6 | DwayneCalzon | 40% | 445 |
| #7 | Kuruko_bdn | 38% | 139 |
| #8 | Vitality Diamsmen | 37% | 101 |
| #9 | Toyz | 35% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DwayneCalzon | 39 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | N0kizzz | 18 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Kuruko_bdn | 13 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | ★TaPz | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | mAdness | 4 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DwayneCalzon | 558 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #2 | Kuruko_bdn | 305 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | N0kizzz | 199 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | mAdness | 189 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #5 | GroBoulard | 146 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0kizzz | +8.30 | 94 | 54 |
| #2 | ★TaPz | +4.33 | 89 | 39 |
| #3 | GroBoulard | +3.98 | 91 | 63 |
| #4 | SaPanique | +2.11 | 71 | 62 |
| #5 | mAdness | -1.35 | 62 | 73 |





