








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 262 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1999 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,564 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1640 | 36% |
| Smokes | 609 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 1419 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 896 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,252,485 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 440 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broski | 50% | 147 |
| #2 | Mclovin | 48% | 125 |
| #3 | hunter hunter | 45% | 154 |
| #4 | Devilish | 43% | 89 |
| #5 | Thanesus | 29% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broski | 50% | 147 |
| #2 | Mclovin | 48% | 125 |
| #3 | hunter hunter | 45% | 154 |
| #4 | Devilish | 43% | 89 |
| #5 | Thanesus | 29% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hunter hunter | 21 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Mclovin | 17 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Devilish | 9 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Broski | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Thanesus | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broski | 153 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #2 | Devilish | 149 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | hunter hunter | 94 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Mclovin | 82 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Thanesus | 36 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hunter hunter | +2.04 | 42 | 51 |
| #2 | Devilish | +1.96 | 73 | 55 |
| #3 | Broski | +1.10 | 37 | 60 |
| #4 | IndecisiveOne | -1.01 | 49 | 37 |
| #5 | Mclovin | -2.82 | 8 | 56 |





