








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 388 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 225 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3107 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,251 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5106 | 42% |
| Smokes | 3454 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1192 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2499 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $937,219 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 121 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hrtc_ | 60% | 35 |
| #2 | Achilles | 49% | 100 |
| #3 | qwerty; | 48% | 58 |
| #4 | RashH | 48% | 65 |
| #5 | ma5k^ | 47% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Darkseid | 44% | 108 |
| #12 | th0kesh__ | 43% | 44 |
| #13 | Solo | 42% | 141 |
| #14 | cRusN!k | 41% | 32 |
| #15 | Th[o]R- Broken Pad :( | 40% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solo | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | sKy | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Darkseid | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | darK | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Asta | 5 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solo | 338 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Asta | 328 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | sKy | 296 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | darK | 285 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | Darkseid | 257 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hrtc_ | +3.45 | 90 | 55 |
| #2 | ma5k^ | +1.75 | 78 | 48 |
| #3 | Th[o]R- Broken Pad :( | +0.94 | 66 | 58 |
| #4 | Profesor X | +0.52 | 62 | 53 |
| #5 | qwerty; | +0.52 | 56 | 58 |





