








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 59 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 899 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1124 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 823 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 659 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $604,715 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 183 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LemmyDos | 8 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | ✦ rezzi | 6 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | El Nacho | 4 | 0.0313 |
| #4 | Schlobbel | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | kilI | 2 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SUPRIM | 78 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #2 | LemmyDos | 62 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | XerTmet | 46 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | ✦ rezzi | 45 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | kilI | 42 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Nacho | +5.10 | 89 | 35 |
| #2 | XerTmet | +3.63 | 67 | 36 |
| #3 | ✦ rezzi | +3.28 | 68 | 46 |
| #4 | DetroX. | +3.26 | 85 | 54 |
| #5 | Foxcry | +2.38 | 89 | 69 |





