








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 589 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 275 matches | ||
| Wingman | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,019 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2915 | 17% |
| Smokes | 4515 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5383 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4206 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,175,608 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 771 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [KRL] illu | 57% | 90 |
| #2 | Teolino | 56% | 36 |
| #3 | DaN-... | 54% | 41 |
| #4 | Nathan_NTK | 53% | 294 |
| #5 | ✦ rezzi | 53% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nathan_NTK | 386 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #2 | Nosferaschu | 285 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | ✦ rezzi | 98 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Schlobbel | 85 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Atze | 82 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✦ rezzi | +2.27 | 66 | 47 |
| #2 | [KRL] illu | +1.36 | 43 | 52 |
| #3 | DaN-... | +1.24 | 82 | 56 |
| #4 | Nathan_NTK | +1.19 | 66 | 53 |
| #5 | LemmyDos | +1.11 | 64 | 49 |





