








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
651 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,549 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 842 | 33% |
| Smokes | 732 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 625 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 350 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $266,712 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 130 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BlackShawns | 44% | 9 |
| #2 | Crazyfefe | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | pedro | 40% | 5 |
| #4 | Apane | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | e_kebab | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Crazyfefe | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | pedro | 40% | 5 |
| #4 | Apane | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | e_kebab | 37% | 19 |
| #6 | Méthyléne | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Apane | 1 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | pedro | 1 | 0.0091 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | e_kebab | 36 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #2 | Méthyléne | 28 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #3 | pedro | 21 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | Apane | 13 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | BlackShawns | 13 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pedro | +2.71 | 82 | 67 |
| #2 | BlackShawns | +2.33 | 41 | 55 |
| #3 | Kritz Saulcola | +1.09 | 42 | 71 |
| #4 | Crazyfefe | -1.38 | 53 | 23 |
| #5 | Apane | -2.57 | 30 | 33 |





