








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 156 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1039 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,405 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 148 | 11% |
| Smokes | 233 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 707 | 50% |
| Molotovs | 317 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $680,459 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 406 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saulcherie | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | Saulc weeb | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | SUP Rats | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | e_kebab | 50% | 16 |
| #5 | Saulc | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | MA | 40% | 10 |
| #9 | BlackShawns | 36% | 11 |
| #10 | UberSaulc | 29% | 17 |
| #11 | Saulc G2 | 26% | 27 |
| #12 | Méthyléne | 18% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MA | 6 | 0.0297 |
| #2 | Saulc weeb | 3 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Saulcherie | 3 | 0.0173 |
| #4 | Saulc G2 | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Apane | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saulc G2 | 68 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Saulc weeb | 67 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | MA | 61 | 0.30 | 1 min |
| #4 | UberSaulc | 48 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | SUP Rats | 45 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saulcherie | +5.45 | 54 | 71 |
| #2 | MA | +4.40 | 79 | 52 |
| #3 | Saulc weeb | +3.70 | 50 | 76 |
| #4 | SUP Rats | +3.44 | 48 | 58 |
| #5 | Saulc | +2.40 | 39 | 51 |





