








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 224 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1954 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,832 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 821 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1006 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 735 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1270 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $498,350 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 77 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Menorvein | 66% | 44 |
| #2 | | why ¿ ? | 63% | 19 |
| #3 | B3rnx | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | Lelute | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | CarLinnS | 61% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Lelute | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | CarLinnS | 61% | 33 |
| #6 | VK.ayanagod | 57% | 14 |
| #7 | Cep1S <3 | 57% | 14 |
| #8 | zennnN VASCUDO | 46% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CarLinnS | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | zennnN VASCUDO | 2 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Menorvein | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Menorvein | 140 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | Lelute | 127 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | CarLinnS | 88 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | | why ¿ ? | 71 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Cep1S <3 | 59 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lelute | +4.39 | 88 | 61 |
| #2 | | why ¿ ? | +2.88 | 68 | 66 |
| #3 | Cep1S <3 | +2.05 | 50 | 70 |
| #4 | VK.ayanagod | +1.57 | 63 | 53 |
| #5 | Menorvein | +1.45 | 61 | 60 |





