








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 150 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 251 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2445 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,992 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2504 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3279 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3546 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2663 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,088,513 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 105 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JΦλφμιη | 62% | 37 |
| #2 | morto | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | Godino #foreverRiders | 56% | 90 |
| #4 | ♠ | imSheRRy | (⚆_⚆) | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | ThorTicollis | 54% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | LagazoMental | 48% | 61 |
| #11 | joseyyo | 45% | 49 |
| #12 | Rodri | 44% | 18 |
| #13 | ioanaBlue | 41% | 34 |
| #14 | Adriag4 | 41% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adriag4 | 4 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | joseyyo | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Martillo Pilón | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | LagazoMental | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | ThorTicollis | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Godino #foreverRiders | 214 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | JΦλφμιη | 152 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | ThorTicollis | 136 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | morto | 118 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #5 | LagazoMental | 100 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JΦλφμιη | +2.01 | 57 | 70 |
| #2 | <?php?> | +1.67 | 65 | 60 |
| #3 | Godino #foreverRiders | +1.47 | 61 | 63 |
| #4 | Martillo Pilón | +1.45 | 54 | 64 |
| #5 | ThorTicollis | +1.38 | 58 | 68 |





