








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3511 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,456 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3760 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3546 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3220 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1930 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,136,369 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Diems | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | MOSIX | 51% | 182 |
| #6 | EliTheGuy245 | 46% | 54 |
| #7 | Gator | 39% | 49 |
| #8 | CHRIS | 35% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reflex_Swipe | 736 | 0.24 | 17 min |
| #2 | MOSIX | 580 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #3 | Gator | 164 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | EliTheGuy245 | 129 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | CHRIS | 49 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Reflex_Swipe | +4.81 | 85 | 62 |
| #2 | Diems | +3.09 | 81 | 40 |
| #3 | MOSIX | +0.34 | 61 | 49 |
| #4 | Hideo Kojima | -0.40 | 50 | 39 |
| #5 | EliTheGuy245 | -0.40 | 61 | 41 |





