








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 371 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 161 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




103 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3325 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,033 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2968 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1938 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1864 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2263 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $315,661 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 184 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scuds | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | T3R | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | chron | 47% | 17 |
| #4 | Jomby | 47% | 75 |
| #5 | bizkit^ | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jomby | 120 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | T3R | 102 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #3 | bizkit^ | 86 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | scuds | 79 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ketamine Kurosaki | 77 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aggressive homie | +3.09 | 75 | 52 |
| #2 | scuds | +1.85 | 93 | 71 |
| #3 | Jomby | +0.78 | 65 | 45 |
| #4 | chron | +0.36 | 87 | 64 |
| #5 | bizkit^ | -0.03 | 85 | 77 |





