








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 666 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 333 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 136 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4397 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,214 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6721 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5958 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4578 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3957 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $817,019 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 340 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samoha | 21 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | BLYAT MAN | 19 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | 𝓛𝓋𝓛𝓋💗 | 15 | 0.0086 |
| #4 | Return | 12 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | bombardino crocodilo | 12 | 0.0106 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BLYAT MAN | 401 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | Samoha | 330 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | 不嘻嘻 | 299 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Return | 273 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | ななみ | 228 | 0.14 | 5 min |





