








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 622 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 391 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3161 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,676 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1405 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2619 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2342 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3310 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,645,463 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 764 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kkkkk | 49% | 75 |
| #2 | N166A | 49% | 398 |
| #3 | b0xyy | 45% | 217 |
| #4 | 𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖆𝖇𝖑𝖊𝖉 | 44% | 72 |
| #5 | EggY | 43% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kkkkk | 49% | 75 |
| #2 | N166A | 49% | 398 |
| #3 | b0xyy | 45% | 217 |
| #4 | 𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖆𝖇𝖑𝖊𝖉 | 44% | 72 |
| #5 | EggY | 43% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N166A | 91 | 0.0111 |
| #2 | b0xyy | 23 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | 𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖆𝖇𝖑𝖊𝖉 | 11 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | kkkkk | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | EggY | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N166A | 1121 | 0.14 | 26 min |
| #2 | b0xyy | 322 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #3 | 𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖆𝖇𝖑𝖊𝖉 | 116 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | kkkkk | 111 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | EggY | 82 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | b0xyy | +2.46 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | N166A | +0.90 | 61 | 56 |
| #3 | kkkkk | +0.14 | 50 | 52 |
| #4 | 𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖆𝖇𝖑𝖊𝖉 | -1.31 | 48 | 41 |
| #5 | edjis | -1.84 | 63 | 41 |





