








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2468 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 395 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 338 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 193 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 152 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 78 matches | ||
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13894 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,537 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 634 | 8% |
| Smokes | 3707 | 49% |
| HE Grenades | 1533 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1663 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,308,474 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1431 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Thor_zane YT | 43% | 319 |
| #11 | Treble | 41% | 110 |
| #12 | TѲЖЇC Abstract | 40% | 223 |
| #13 | Divine | 40% | 409 |
| #14 | RedKing | 32% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johnny Hollywood | 1504 | 0.08 | 30 min |
| #2 | Divine | 797 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #3 | xdBananna | 585 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #4 | Gl0ck That | 510 | 0.20 | 14 min |
| #5 | RedKing | 420 | 0.16 | 5 min |





