








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3901 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,208 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2454 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3178 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1817 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1759 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $739,355 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 272 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DarkWarrior | 57% | 81 |
| #2 | rocketman | 55% | 200 |
| #3 | Jonas | 50% | 168 |
| #4 | Przemek_3784 SKINS skins.army | 47% | 193 |
| #5 | geir olof | 45% | 245 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonas | 119 | 0.0370 |
| #2 | rocketman | 86 | 0.0218 |
| #3 | geir olof | 79 | 0.0163 |
| #4 | DarkWarrior | 26 | 0.0169 |
| #5 | Przemek_3784 SKINS skins.army | 16 | 0.0042 |





