








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 385 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Premier | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,294 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1610 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1716 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1380 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1588 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $624,525 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KoH1 | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | laso | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | masalskis | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | Kasettiäijä | 61% | 31 |
| #5 | pahaperse | 60% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antz | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Wallu | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Kasettiäijä | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pahaperse | 100 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | cock mösjöö | 86 | 0.36 | 3 min |
| #3 | Kasettiäijä | 76 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | laso | 48 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | masalskis | 41 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wallu | +2.45 | 57 | 55 |
| #2 | laso | +0.70 | 53 | 78 |
| #3 | Liru | +0.67 | 65 | 72 |
| #4 | cock mösjöö | +0.51 | 62 | 81 |
| #5 | pahaperse | +0.43 | 59 | 65 |





