








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 465 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 403 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3872 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,375 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4254 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4155 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4725 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3241 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,423,716 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 690 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | digi | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | r0ntti | 57% | 61 |
| #3 | smB^🧙 | 57% | 35 |
| #4 | KapaK | 56% | 128 |
| #5 | beer32 | 53% | 257 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | astee | 46% | 48 |
| #12 | palvaren | 42% | 78 |
| #13 | M0nk | 42% | 31 |
| #14 | Piimäpurkki | 41% | 44 |
| #15 | Varpe | 39% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milu | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | LUMOTTU | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | KapaK | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | palvaren | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | beer32 | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milu | 664 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #2 | beer32 | 651 | 0.11 | 19 min |
| #3 | LUMOTTU | 242 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #4 | N1k0ps | 213 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | KapaK | 206 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LUMOTTU | +2.59 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | beer32 | +1.92 | 68 | 72 |
| #3 | smB^🧙 | +1.64 | 66 | 62 |
| #4 | Piimäpurkki | +1.17 | 75 | 76 |
| #5 | digi | +1.14 | 66 | 54 |





