








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 477 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2922 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,805 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3019 | 52% |
| Smokes | 1570 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 747 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 469 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $198,551 of utility $39 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 卖火机di小男孩 | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | DRKD(fps练习生) | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | m1sakasamaaa | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | 渡辺曜 | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | ak4sh1zera | 49% | 239 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ak4sh1zera | 17 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Mizoreのoboe | 10 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | 渡辺曜 | 10 | 0.0133 |
| #4 | 卖火机di小男孩 | 6 | 0.0224 |
| #5 | m1sakasamaaa | 4 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ak4sh1zera | 830 | 0.18 | 24 min |
| #2 | Burning Hami | 110 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | MOUZ.b0cchiZz | 73 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | 渡辺曜 | 72 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | m1sakasamaaa | 43 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 渡辺曜 | +7.21 | 94 | 55 |
| #2 | Burning Hami | +4.92 | 80 | 51 |
| #3 | m1sakasamaaa | +4.06 | 63 | 38 |
| #4 | davinci254254 | +1.87 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | 卖火机di小男孩 | +1.70 | 84 | 31 |





