








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 14 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
171 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 485 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 215 | 44% |
| Smokes | 47 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 105 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 118 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $42,849 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jim | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | ✪TaMM➝ | 43% | 14 |
| #3 | smithyyy | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | »Riordan272« | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | Hypr | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jim | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | ✪TaMM➝ | 43% | 14 |
| #3 | smithyyy | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | »Riordan272« | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | Hypr | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪TaMM➝ | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smithyyy | 65 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #2 | ✪TaMM➝ | 50 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | »Riordan272« | 13 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #4 | Hypr | 5 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #5 | Jim | 3 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jim | +1.87 | 63 | 40 |
| #2 | smithyyy | +1.82 | 72 | 76 |
| #3 | Master Oogway | -0.91 | 58 | 51 |
| #4 | ✪TaMM➝ | -2.50 | 77 | 73 |
| #5 | »Riordan272« | -2.97 | 61 | 72 |





