








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 900 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Faceit | 214 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Esplay | 13 matches | 1,668 | |
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 129 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6976 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,555 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8615 | 22% |
| Smokes | 11435 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 8121 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 10384 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,242,720 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2577 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bEkoni | 58% | 72 |
| #2 | Sam | 54% | 124 |
| #3 | arttU | 54% | 247 |
| #4 | SIPERIANTIIKERI | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | Tunkki | 52% | 288 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | jojo | 49% | 191 |
| #11 | Saddam Hussein | 48% | 50 |
| #12 | Oggloc | 48% | 88 |
| #13 | Lalsu | 43% | 61 |
| #14 | The⛧GrimReaper | 38% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tunkki | 27 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | arttU | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Sam | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | SUHINA | 7 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | MunQsika | 6 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tunkki | 807 | 0.14 | 20 min |
| #2 | arttU | 477 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | tauski | 367 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | Henkka | 362 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #5 | jojo | 289 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tunkki | +2.48 | 77 | 66 |
| #2 | Saddam Hussein | +2.44 | 76 | 65 |
| #3 | arttU | +1.78 | 50 | 70 |
| #4 | Henkka | +1.62 | 75 | 79 |
| #5 | Sam | +1.38 | 55 | 61 |





