








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 282 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2191 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,318 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 109 | 3% |
| Smokes | 462 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 2822 | 65% |
| Molotovs | 925 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $852,124 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Anilyse♡ | 37% | 240 |
| #7 | Moless Teer | 36% | 113 |
| #8 | Rustyy | 33% | 30 |
| #9 | MCSAUCE | 33% | 129 |
| #10 | Coil | 28% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anilyse♡ | 762 | 0.17 | 16 min |
| #2 | Moless Teer | 457 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #3 | GangGang Nigga BangBang | 414 | 0.24 | 11 min |
| #4 | MCSAUCE | 337 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | Rogger | 226 | 0.21 | 6 min |





