








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 256 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1386 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,930 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1677 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1001 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1249 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1003 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $603,596 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2065 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bogdan | 54% | 37 |
| #2 | Adolf Diddler | 51% | 53 |
| #3 | 𝕬𝖑𝖊𝖒𝖆𝖓 | 49% | 63 |
| #4 | Niilob0b | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Rick Grimes | 48% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Niilob0b | 48% | 33 |
| #5 | Rick Grimes | 48% | 29 |
| #6 | AleksiK | 48% | 46 |
| #7 | Matinger | 45% | 11 |
| #8 | bsateb | 43% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adolf Diddler | 9 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | 𝕬𝖑𝖊𝖒𝖆𝖓 | 8 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | bsateb | 8 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | Bogdan | 7 | 0.0111 |
| #5 | AleksiK | 4 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adolf Diddler | 164 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | bsateb | 160 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | 𝕬𝖑𝖊𝖒𝖆𝖓 | 142 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | AleksiK | 111 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Bogdan | 54 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AleksiK | +1.65 | 28 | 70 |
| #2 | 𝕬𝖑𝖊𝖒𝖆𝖓 | +1.43 | 69 | 43 |
| #3 | bsateb | +1.03 | 69 | 46 |
| #4 | Rick Grimes | +0.61 | 57 | 32 |
| #5 | Dessukissa | +0.52 | 29 | 58 |





