








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 555 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Esplay | 12 matches | 1,732 | |
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,636 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1420 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2269 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2127 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1820 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,314,041 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 897 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knopfler | 62% | 79 |
| #2 | Saiko | 59% | 32 |
| #3 | BOT Gunnar | 59% | 71 |
| #4 | Zyr0ooo | 56% | 149 |
| #5 | BrinkeN | 55% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saiko | 7 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | jokke | 6 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Knopfler | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Zyr0ooo | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | grisconny | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zyr0ooo | 324 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | grisconny | 194 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | jokke | 167 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | Saiko | 120 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | Knopfler | 117 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saiko | +6.80 | 90 | 75 |
| #2 | grisconny | +1.99 | 71 | 53 |
| #3 | lassegoon | +1.20 | 71 | 49 |
| #4 | BrinkeN | +0.92 | 66 | 54 |
| #5 | Knopfler | +0.75 | 56 | 48 |





