








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 382 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 152 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3388 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,318 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1040 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1451 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 725 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1102 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $958,589 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 188 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prize | 52% | 27 |
| #2 | Saor Alba | 50% | 107 |
| #3 | Mr.Wong | 50% | 147 |
| #4 | awppenhe1mer | 46% | 26 |
| #5 | PäronJuice | 46% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Mr.Wong | 50% | 147 |
| #4 | awppenhe1mer | 46% | 26 |
| #5 | PäronJuice | 46% | 72 |
| #6 | Puss in Boots | 40% | 57 |
| #7 | slizzo | 39% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Wong | 24 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | slizzo | 20 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | PäronJuice | 16 | 0.0108 |
| #4 | Puss in Boots | 10 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | awppenhe1mer | 5 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saor Alba | 126 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | PäronJuice | 105 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Mr.Wong | 89 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | awppenhe1mer | 61 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Puss in Boots | 43 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Monke | +3.34 | 58 | 46 |
| #2 | Prize | +0.54 | 34 | 46 |
| #3 | Mr.Wong | -1.08 | 28 | 30 |
| #4 | Puss in Boots | -1.28 | 19 | 17 |
| #5 | Saor Alba | -2.72 | 44 | 51 |





